Adam in Space/Issue 6
This be it, man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Da final fuckin battle fo' realz. Adam tha prophecy pimp leadin his thugged-out army of ba playas ta bust a cap up in tha midget n' his thugged-out army. Da prophecy has arrived, fo' on dis fuckin day, Adam will save da ghetto. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Adam drives a spaceshizzle across tha space, wit KP up in a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dirty-ass shizzle next ta his ass n' a army behind his muthafuckin ass. Jammin ta some rap ass ghetto nizzle beatz, Adam gets all pumped up yo. Dude is locked n loaded ta bust a cap up in them, especially fo' what tha fuck they did ta his brutha pimp Joel. Da army soon drives up ta Devonz giant ass space ship, n' tha pimpin' muthafucka too has a army of ships behind his muthafuckin ass. "AJ is up in da ship!" KP calls ta Adam. "Devon has tha masta AJ!" "Then we gotta git dat nizzle back!" Adam say fo' realz. As Adam drop a rhyme dis, another shizzle pulls up beside Adam n' KP fo' realz. Adam sees it be Mark Rands, da most thugged-out skilled pilot of tha fleet yo. Dude be a funky-ass ba pimp, just like KP. Mark Randz looks over at his ass n' nodz his head, sayin no lyrics cuz he a funky-ass bad-fucking-ass. "Lets go bust a cap up in they asses!" Adam n' his ba army fly up ta Devonz army, which is bein controlled by barbies, n' blast at em. Da spaceships all begins blastin at each other n' like lasers be flyin all over tha place n' shiznit fo' realz. As each shizzle goes down a wilhelm scream is heard. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da spaceshizzle battlez blast da lasers yo, but as dis happen, Adam flies arouund blastin tha ships yo, but then da perved-out muthafucka sees a openin up in tha ship. With Mark Randz n' KP wit him, Adam flies towardz tha giant ass space shizzle n' fires at dat shit. Da shizzle fires back yo, but luckily they fire like Stormtroppers so they miss so fuckin bad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da three ba ships blast up in tha window n' fly tha fuck into tha shizzle af. They land they ships n' they all like "lets go bust a cap up in some mothafuckas" With fuckin laser glocks tha three ba playas blast threw tha barbies, knockin down all whos tand up in they way. No one can beat these three pimps yo. However n' shit. they turn down tha hall n' stop. In front of dem standz Nathan, whoz ass holdz a giant ass bloody sword. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Dude all like "imma keel you mothafuckas cuz yall fgts n' I must rule da ghetto!' KP be all like "I be da most thugged-out ba playa kickin it, n' I'ma bust a cap up in youu" "Go back o Asia! Nathan yells n' charges at his muthafuckin ass. KP pulls up a mega ass sword n' swings at Nathan, startin tha beginnin of tha mega ass ba battle. KP n' Nathan swin they swordz at each other n' begin bustin fuckin flips n' shiznit cuz illest ba. Mark Randz n' Adam run tha fuck into tha next hall, where they find a army of barbie dolls hustled by a gangbangin' fuckin Elsa doll. "Yall mothafuckas is not pimps!" Elsa blasts a giant ass icebizzle at em. "Yall is ghey. GHEYYY!!" Elsa n' ehr lil barbie playaz git all up in battle yo, but Mark Randz simply points fo' Adam ta leave n' goes ta fight tha barbies. Put ya muthafuckin choppers up if ya feel dis! Mark Randz pulls up a katana n' charges tha barbies. Put ya muthafuckin choppers up if ya feel dis! Mark kicks n' slashes n' fights off tha barbies, while elsa blasts ice ballz at his muthafuckin ass. As dat goes on, KP n' Nathan is fightin wit they swordz on a cold-ass lil crate. KP n' Nathan is like "fuck u im better" n' slash at each other n' shit. Nathan then throws KP off tha crate yo, but KP uses his ba powers ta jump onto tha crate n' battle him! Nathan be all "i'm cooler!"but his ba powers stand no chizzle up against KP, whoz ass is shrekin his muthafuckin ass. "U will loze cuz u not a pimp!" Nathan screams at his muthafuckin ass. "I be tha illest pimp!" Nathan leaps at KP n' staabs his ass up in tha fuckin stomach. KP pauses yo, but then he is like "no, i be tha illest pimp!" n' da perved-out muthafucka swings his sword at Nathanz head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! KP fuckin decapitates Nathan, tha illest decapitator playa! Nathanz head rolls away while KP sits down on tha cargo, holdin his bloody stomach, wit a smile yo. Dude spits on Nathan'z body like "fuck you". Mark Randz continues ta fight wit tha barbies, n' dat schmoooove muthafucka has capped all except Elsa. Elsa be all mad n' fires ice ballz at Mark yo, but Mark fuckin punches throu tha ice balls n' grabs Elsa by tha throat. barbie elsa cries but Mark fuckin snaps her neck n' tosses her babrie doll across tha room. Adam runs tha fuck into tha throne room, where da perved-out muthafucka sees Devon at his cold-ass throne, holdin tha magic af playa Aj at gunpoint. "Yo ass wack pimp!" Devon screams. "I be Lord Devon! Yo ass can't bust a nut on me!" "I gotta look down just ta peep you" Adam says "What tha fuck you say ta me son?!" Devon tries ta blast Adam yo, but Adam fuckin ninja n' dodges all tha bullets, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. Devon runs outta bullets n' panicks yo. Dude tries ta run af but Adam fuckin hawk dives up tha stairs n' tacklez Devon. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "I be yo' lord!" Devon all like. "This ghetto is ghon be mine biaaatch! Yo ass is mah slave!" "No." Adam grabs Devon by tha neck n' lifts his ass off tha ground. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "I be Adam fuckin Dugall fo' realz. And yo ass is mah biiiatch, nizzle!" Adam throws Devon tha fuck into a airvent, which then sucks his ass outta tha spacehsip n' tha fuck into space, where Adam watches as Devon flies round n' cries before his head fuckin explodes. "Science, biiiatch!" Adam turns towardz A.J., whoz ass is up in dis white ass suit n' be lookin like a angel. "Wuz crackalackin' Adam." Dude speak. "I be A.J. I be tha lyricist." "What tha fuck be a author?" "I create stories. Put ya muthafuckin choppers up if ya feel dis! Worlds. People." Aj say. "We is standin up in one n' aint a thugged-out damn thang dat yo' ass can do." "This be a story, biatch? A fuckin story, biatch? Do you know all tha nizzlez n' pimps I lost fo' a gangbangin' fuckin story?!" "Yes yes y'all. But, hey, what tha fuck a thugged-out damn fine rap it was. Right, biatch? 128 might me among mah finest work fo' realz. As is 100, 105.." "What tha fuck is poppin' off wit yo slick ass?" "I be a gangbangin' fgt. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sorry." "I risked mah ass n' lost mah playa ta save yo slick ass?" Adam say. "A dude dat fucked up mah game fo' a story?" "Not just any story. Da top billin rap dawwwwg! My fuckin masterpiece biaaatch! And you, Adam, is mah prize creation." Aj smilez at Adam. "And dat is why our crazy asses here." "Why our crazy asses here?" "Cuz I can't do dis no mo'. Do these stories, I mean." Aj all like. "I saw how tha fuck evil I am, n' mah evil cannot be undone. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So, Im givin u mah juice n' shit. With dis juice you can do anythang wit tha swipe of a hand. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! It aint nuthin but time ta rap r story." Adam be all shocked n' then Aj claps his handz n' a white, glowin spirit leaves his body n' goes tha fuck into Adam fo' realz. Adam be all like what tha fuck tha fuck but when he opens his wild lil' fuckin eyes da perved-out muthafucka sees dat Aj is gone fo' realz. Adam be all like oh shiznit i gots tha juice n' shit. But what tha fuck he gonna do wit it? "FUck dis bullshit!" Adam swipes his hand n' tha pimpin' muthafucka teleports his dirty ass, KP, Mark n' his thugged-out army ta dis fuckin tropical beach fo' realz. Adam then swipes his hand again n' again n' again n' his thugged-out lil' pimp brothers back ta game. Joel comes back ta game. Fuckin Cole comes back ta game. Dude comes back ta game fo' realz. All tha skanky pimp souls whoz ass took a dirt nap up in DF (yeah Micah is back too!) come abck ta game. "This is mah rap dawwwwg! My fuckin pimp ass story!" Everyone cheers n' Adam creates beer and hot ass girls. Adam, Joel n' Cole grab brews n' go round gettin all tha hoes. Now tha author of tha story, Adam turns towardz us viewer n' winks his wild lil' fuckin eye. "Let me show you mothafuckas a real story!" And thus, as one ended, another fuckin started LONG LIVE ADAM AND THE PIMPS PEACE OUT MOTHAFUCKAS Category:Adam In Space Category:Adam in fucking space Category:I repeat Adam in fucking space Category:Adam in Space Issues